Shaunie C, Band 5 Midwife
Life for me used to be like a big dark cloud was hanging over me. It wasn't a nice place to be in. I'd overthink things. Internalise things, like everything was my fault. I was down all the time, to the point where I had started on medication because it would get that bad. I was kind of stuck in a rut that couldn't get out of. I'd just completed three years of university and qualified with a good grade, but I couldn't see myself moving any further forward. I wasn't happy. I was numb.
I was a newly qualified band 5 at that time. I'd literally just started, I don't even think I'd even done a shift but I was just overthinking it completely. I ended up having four weeks off work sick. I couldn't even see myself being a midwife. I couldn't even make many plans for the future, because I felt like I couldn't see one.
Despite just qualifying and having this career that I really wanted and had worked so hard for, I just couldn't see past it. I couldn't see what I could become because I was just in that mindset. I found Radha on Instagram. I had read some amazing feedback from other Midwives who had worked with her and I also remember her coming into University to do a session and I'd thought to myself back then that I wanted to be like her. She was just so positive and confident. That's what made me think that I had to at least speak to Radha and enquire. I knew that if I don't do something, nothing was going change and it was probably going to get worse.
I can honestly say that working with Radha has completely changed my mindset. She's given the skills to change it. To see that I do have a future and that I'll be able to do what I want to do. To be the midwife that I want to be without having those crippling self doubts. I can control them now. I still have a lot of work to do but obviously from where I started just a few months ago to where I'm at now it's a massive difference, its incredible! I've just got so much more confidence in myself and my ability. To get myself out of that negative thinking. Its honestly completely changed my life.
I honestly can't believe how much I've changed. How much better it's made me feel on a daily basis. When I first started, I didn't think that anything could change. I just thought that was me. This is who I am. Radha showed me I could and I'm so glad I reached out. Radha's very flexible and always worked around my shifts and last minute changes.
If you're sat on the fence about contacting Radha all I can say is do it! Don't listen to your negative internal voice, just go for it. This course has changed my way of thinking so much and you never know if it will work for you too unless you try.
I want to say thank you Radha. You are amazing! I know I couldn't have made these massive changes alone and I likely wouldn't be a midwife today without your help. Thank you so much!
Madyasa V, Student Midwife
Before Radha and I started working together it was pretty rough. I was struggling a lot with anxiety and depression. As a student midwife placements were always something I got very anxious about with my social anxiety and it led me to just totally loose they joy in doing what I actually love. I saw Radha's on a webinar with Sheena Byrom about going from Burnt out to Brilliant and it helped me see that there we're tools that I could use to really help myself. I checked Radha's website and read her story and it just made me feel like I wasn't alone. Because up to that point I hadn't realised how much of a problem these things are for many people. I felt like it was going to be such an important investment to make as it's literally about investing in myself. I thought 'I can do without handbags, this is going to be essential to my career”, so I'm very happy that I went for it. Working with Radha has been amazing! It's helped me to make the link between what I'm struggling with and how to resolve it and how do you turn it around. It's given me a more in depth knowledge about what actually is going on in my head. So much stuff that I knew I did but I did not know why. I think the process I've been through has been quite a unique journey. I really liked it when Radha's told me that it looks different for everybody and I think that's true. I had this idea that I was going to do this eight weeks and then I'm going to be sparkly. I didn't know exactly how that was going to happen and although I could feel changes in myself as we went along I didn't always feel like I was gonna get there. I hoped for it but did not fully expect it to begin with, I just had no clue where it was going to go but I trusted Radha. Now I've got to the end of the 8 weeks I feel really empowered, powerful. Also calm and very free. For me it was just so valuable to have a coach that was midwifery specific. Radha made it relevant to what I was experiencing so it was more powerful than working with any other therapist or coach. The fact that she has experienced similar things to me and had made it through made so much difference. If you're considering working with Radha then just do it!
Sarah B, Band 5 Midwife
Before I joined Radha’s Midwife Sparkle Method programme I was really struggling at work, mainly because I felt very overwhelmed. I felt like I had my confidence knocked by a few different situations where I’d reflected and reflected and wound myself up in knots trying to think it through and understand the reasons why I’d made those mistakes. I felt like I was unable to really get the best of myself as a midwife, I just felt like I was worthless. I had massive imposter syndrome, not really understanding where I fit in and feeling quite undervalued. Especially during a time of great uncertainty during the pandemic, it had been a real challenging situation. But I thought at two years qualified I should have been in a certain place and I just wasn’t getting there. There were things holding me back, things that I couldn’t really put my finger on and I couldn’t give my full attention to understanding what it was. I was a complete mess. I was burnt out. My Midwife essence was diluted, my sparkle was totally gone. I was even changing my appearance to sort of fit in with being normal and low key. And my attitude was starting to change. I needed to be able to and be able to cope better with work and my life. My work life balance was just so disjointed and unbalanced. I felt like I was totally out of control. And I think Radha gave me a glimmer of hope that I could change these things. I know I needed to get to the deeper issues that I’ve never come face to face with for the first time. Meeting Radha was a bit of a miracle moment, really. I trusted her and I just wanted to run with it. I just felt like I was ready. I’d spent a fortune on the chiropractor to get my back right so why not sort out my head out too? I felt like I was being really selfish at the time because it was Christmas coming up and we were getting a new puppy and everything. And I thought I don’t know how I’m going to do this but we found a way and it was honestly the biggest worthwhile investment that I’ve ever made. I actually worry for myself that if I hadn’t have done this, how negatively that would have impacted on my health – my physical and mental health. I’m not sure where I would have ended up. The structure of the programme means no stone is left unturned. Week on week, building a really solid foundation. It really helps you to go through every little bit of what you didn’t realise was wrong for you to make sense of it all in the end. I’m really visual and I needed to have those analogies, Radha really put some great analogies into my head to help me understand the points that she was talking about. Because for somebody that’s not trained in this kind of thing it’s just made it so much easier to understand and how it applied to me. Throughout this last 8 weeks I think people have seen how I’ve changed and even though I’m generally a positive person on the surface, when that positivity is deep down and real, that’s where the real magic is. Doing this course has made my Midwife essence go right back up to like 99.99% (Because I don’t think you can ever be 100%) It’s just amazing! I’ve now got my band six on the horizon and my mentorship, I just didn’t have the confidence to go for either before I started this process with Radha. I’m really looking forward to being able to practice the skills I’ve learnt and pass them on to the students that are coming into practice. I want to let them see the REAL me – a confident mentor that is very self aware, who looks after her well being and isn’t floundering under the pressures of the system. I want to be an inspiration to them. For them to be able to come to work and think you can do more than just survive, as we can’t just go to work and survive in the NHS. Although it feels like we’re doing that at the minute sometimes. But we need to live, we need to remember why we came into this in the first place. Being with a student midwife and helping them to understand their potential, and help them move forward and talk about the tricky stuff and celebrate the real wins that they have to help them maintain their sparkle! If you’re coming from a place where you are really struggling, and you feel like you’re lost, your value is lost and if you don’t feel like you’re worth it just take that leap of faith. Because if you don’t ever do it, you’ll never know. And life is not about holding back. It’s about just jumping for the things that you think matter. And you might not think that you matter at the moment, because I certainly didn’t. But it’s the best thing that I’ve done. I’ve never invested in myself like this and I just wish that I’d done it a lot sooner. I wish I’d met Radha sooner. Like when I was student midwife, because that was when I was going through a lot, and I didn’t realise until now. But I suppose I needed to work through that process to come to the realisation that I needed the help in the first place. I just feel complete empowerment now! Radha’s taught me a better way to be myself, and helped me find a better version of myself. And it just feels like I’m coming from a place of strength. I do actually feel really sparkly! It’s cheesy stuff, but it’s true. And it means that I can go into work with a smile on my face. And it’s real, it’s not fake. What’s better than that?
Vicky W, Band 7 Midwife
I was burnt out literally. I had just started a period of sickness off work for stress and anxiety. I felt that I was completely overwhelmed. I had lots of personal things going on in my life that were presenting difficulty, plus the stresses of Covid and I had stopped being able to work effectively. I was desperate to learn some skills to get my life back on track. I knew I couldn’t continue as I was and just doing counselling didn’t seem enough. The idea of doing personal growth work tailored especially for midwives just seemed perfect. When you knew this programme was going to help you. I knew before I even booked on to be honest. However, after having an initial chat with Radha before booking it was clear that Radha was going to be an easy person to work with. She is very easy to talk to and just being made to feel comfortable with such vulnerable work I knew it was going to be invaluable. I think the idea that I would be able to take back control of my life and release the things that I can’t control really appealed. My only reservation initially was the cost. However, I was able to pay in instalments and that worked well for me, so it didn’t appear to be such a hit on the wallet. I also broke it down and realised that each session was not much more than my counselling sessions and that this was going to be learning skills that I would be able to use for life. I also knew that I would have support in-between if needed. Basically I felt like I can not put a price on my mental health and so the cost as a factor went out the window. The program has done exactly what I hoped it would do and more. Along with time of work and counselling it has given me back me. I had lost myself. I am back now, I am me. Even my friends are noticing the difference. It has given me the courage to learn what is right for me. I have learnt that I need to be living my life for myself and not for others. The way I am thinking now is really different. I have a lot more awareness of my thoughts and if they are negative then I can change them to make myself feel happier. I have so much more power over my life and my thoughts than I ever realised possible. I also understand why I have conflicts in my head at work about best to do things. I have started being so much kinder to myself and regulating my emotions in a healthy way. My confidence and self esteem has grown so much. I am now starting to feel ready to return to work and this time with realistic expectations of myself. I know that I will be able to go back with the skills to not get myself into such a dark place again. In between each session there are exercises to I do and as the program went on these exercises took you a bit deeper. It was harder to face these and I would sometimes procrastinate. As part of the course is about procrastination though it gave me the chance to practice the new skills I was learning .I didn’t want to give up at any point as I knew it was good for me (a bit like medicine, but much more fun). The main sticking point for me was the subject of ‘pay off’. I really struggled with this concept and what it really meant and what that meant for me. However, Radha was great and she went through it with me several times. We even did an extra session to go through it all again. Radha was very patient and never made me feel daft. I wish that everyone could do this program. I feel like I have found me again. I have rediscovered some self-esteem and self- confidence. I am more shiny than I was before. I feel so much more in control of my life and how external things affect me, which is very freeing. I am now able to start moving on with my life. I know that although it is the end of the program there is still lots of work to do and it will probably never end. I want to be the best person than I can be and with the skills that I have learnt through this program I think this can happen. The biggest thing that is happening for me right now is that I have just become single and I have found myself a new apartment, which is very me. My friends are telling me I am much more myself, my sassiness is coming back. I am feeling ready to go back to work and put my effort into it and then celebrate it. I was burnt out, but some of my fire has returned. My life has changed in lots of ways. I am so much more aware of my thoughts and how they negatively impact me; this isn’t fun, so I change them to good thoughts. I am so much kinder to myself which is making a huge difference to my self-esteem. I feel so much happier than I did before. I have rediscovered myself. I felt that I had disappeared, but I am back! ? My plans are to keep doing the things that are right for me. I am not going to worry about doing what is right for everyone else all the time. I am excited about putting boundaries in and being more effective with my time through less procrastination. I am excited about being single and not needing to answer to anyone else. I am looking forward to going back to work and improving as the Band 7 midwife that I am. Most of all I am excited to feel free and know that my options in life are endless. If you are even considering doing the program, then just do it. You will not regret it. You do need to be prepared to put some effort in; that is really important. Radha is flexible though and if you are struggling one week that you can always have more time before sessions. I think that what Radha teaches would improve anyone’s life who chooses to do it. You can't put a price on something that is life changing!
Julie J, Student Midwife
I think I’ve spent definitely the last 15 years, probably longer when I think back, just caught up in anxiety, depression, mood disorders. Real effects on my life. I think I feel like I probably lost years of my 20s and 30s just caught up in anxiety. Not being able to do what I wanted to do. And then feeling like I might move forward with something, like getting onto the midwifery course. And then anxiety would kick in again. And I’m back to square one. And so at the point where I met Radha, and I was rock bottom, really. I couldn’t focus on my life, my course or placement. Nothing was working, and I couldn’t see a way forward. I came across Radha from a post that had been shared on Instagram and then listened to a Facebook Live that she did and I felt like it was a real turning point. I think I’ve looked for help and support with dealing with anxiety for so many years, and I’ve tried various different things, counselling, medication, CBT. None of it really got me to that point that I could really take back control of my life. Just everything Radha said seemed to really resonate with what I needed. And I think being a midwife herself as well, I think that really gave me that boost. And I think I’ve been looking for something maybe in the wrong place. And I think what Radha was offering meant I wasn’t necessarily needing to deal with past trauma and things like that. I needed something that could focus me on taking control of my life and my thoughts and where I wanted to go. And that’s why I came to her. I had huge reservations about starting, even the first phone call that we planned, I didn’t think I’d manage to come on the call because my anxiety was so high. I couldn’t even jump on that call and speak to her. And it was the best thing that she gently persuaded me to come on. It was the best thing I’ve ever done. And I get emotional because I just feel like it’s turned my life around. And I had reservations because I couldn’t see how I could move past that anxiety at the time. It was too consuming. And, and it’s gone. I can say that I don’t suffer with anxiety. This process has completely changed my life. And it’s only been eight weeks, I can confidently say that it has changed every aspect of my life- my personal life,my career, my studies. I feel like a different person. I feel excited and its just the best feeling. Realising that I’ve got control over my thoughts. I’ve got control over the anxiety, the anxiety has just literally melted away because I realised that I’m more powerful than that. It’s not who I am any more. I just don’t allow it to be there. So it’s just melted away. And so the biggest thing I think is just knowing that I can cope with whatever comes my way because I’ve got the tools and the power. I know bad days are gonna come and bad times are gonna come. But I know that I’ve got the tools to be able to deal with them. It’s not been an easy eight weeks. But each week, I’ve looked forward to coming on the calls, because each week I’ve learned different techniques and different tools. And I think what’s been powerful about it is that it’s made me think about and confront thoughts and ways of thinking that I’ve probably held on to for years, probably since childhood. Thinking that I can’t do certain things or that I’m not good enough to do certain things and various different other issues like that. And it’s been really hard, going back and going inwards, and kind of hitting those things head on to be able to release them. I would recommend this course to anybody is is fantastic. I’m so so happy that I’ve done it. It’s the best money I’ve ever spent. I don’t think I can put a price on overcoming anxiety. It was completely ruling my life. I couldn’t work properly. I couldn’t function properly. And it was affecting my whole life. So I can’t put a price on that. I think the money has just been insignificant really. Because what I’ve got has been worth so much more. I feel so positive and excited about what’s to come. And I haven’t felt like that for years. I can’t even remember the last time that I’ve genuinely felt excited about my future. And what’s what’s happening now. There’s so many good things I’ve got to look forward to without having to worry about anxiety creeping in because I know it’s gone. If your wondering whether you should do this course then just do it. Just make contact with Radha just make contact, send the email, send the message. Just have a chat because it is the best thing. And I can’t explain to people how much anxiety was ruling me at the time. I can’t explain. And, and in that short period of time that’s gone. It’s just amazing, so incredible. Radha I cannot thank you enough. You have been incredible!
Lennette N, Clinical Midwife
My work life in particular was quite hard. It just felt hard and heavy. I would have to talk to myself before going to work. I just didn’t have much enthusiasm. I wanted something to change. I’ve been a midwife now for 25 years and I remember what it was like to have the joy of midwifery, the joy of being with a woman. That joy of just going to work and it not feeling like work. That’s how it used to be and then over time things change. Life happens. Of recent times, I’ve found it quite challenging. I’ve been in a different work environment, which hasn’t always matched up with my own beliefs. And so that that’s been quite difficult for me. I felt like I’d compromised my beliefs or sold out of myself in order to earn the money. I felt pretty powerless. Like I was stuck in that situation. Then I met Radha. I’d followed her on social media for a while and I resonated with what she was saying. She was so joyful and sparkly and spoke so passionately and I remember feeling like that. She made me believe it was possible for me to be like that again. I was a little nervous but I knew if I don’t do something differently then things we’re just going to stay the same. My three big things prior to starting the Midwife Sparkle Method with Radha were people pleasing, procrastination ans perfectionism. I was so constricted in my life, everywhere I went. It turns out they are just all different sides to the same coin, a way of protecting myself. But I’m able to identify and create more positive self beliefs now so I don’t have to worry about these things any more. It’s just such a huge sense of freedom. The biggest thing I could say that I’ve got from our sessions together is just freedom. I have so much more freedom in all areas of my life. There’s something magical about being free to be who you are. You don’t have to please other people. I now believe I am enough exactly as I am. I don’t have to change anything about myself so people like me more. What’s important is how I feel about me. Not what other people think. You don’t have to be perfect. It used to take so much energy trying to hold all those other things together. It’s exhausting when you’re trying to keep all those plates spinning. I realise I will make mistakes because that’s just part of being a human being. Other people make mistakes too but I’ll just give my best efforts, and know I can’t do anything more than that. I can see the positive effects that going through this process has had on my life, and not just at work, everywhere. I feel like I have more control and I can see and embrace my personal influence too. I don’t just have to accept things the way they are. I am enjoying work more but the other place where it’s really showing up for me is just in how I’m taking care of myself more. Just the small decisions in my everyday life to look after me. I feel joyful. Joyful is different from happy. Yes I feel sparkly and enthusiastic. Everyone wants to be a sparkly midwife or you want to have a sparkly midwife, as sparkly for me means enthusiastic and joyful. It’s kind of like an energy for life. You just see so many more possibilities, so many more things that are available to you, but that you just couldn’t see them through the old belief you held about yourself. It’s been so fun! I would describe it as fun. Radha held my hand and helped me to look at stuff like my thoughts and my beliefs. She then gave me tools for my emotional health toolbox so that I could see things in a different way, and because I could see it in a different way everything changed. Before I would be seeing what I thought was reality, but it wasn’t reality. It was just a story I’d made up or a picture of my perception of reality. But now I can see it with more clearly. I can see what’s real. It’s just life changing! I have had coaching and different things in the past but what’s particularly good about Radha’s coaching style are the stories and the tools that she uses. I can visualise it all more clearly and remember it when its explained in a way I can relate to rather then just been told something. How she explains the concepts and frames it made it so much easier to understand and for it to stick in my head. I honestly would have paid three times what I paid to get the result that I got from this. I have in fact paid more for other things and not got a quarter of what I got from our time together. I think it should be available for our children in schools. These techniques should definitely be available for everyone because everyone has thoughts. Everyone has beliefs. But I think the particular beauty about what Radha is offering for Midwives is because it is so tailored for them, although it can apply to everyone. And that made it kind of more special and relevant. I just really can’t put it into words how grateful I am. I honestly didn’t see even right up until the last session how far I’d come. I didn’t realise how much progress I’d made but Radha helped me see that and celebrate it. I think that over time, the benefits will become more and more too. Wow! Radha I just want to say thank you so much for the amazing work that you do.
Danielle J, Band 6 Midwife
Before I worked with Radha I was very stressed. Blaming other people for the things that were happening to me, rather than taking responsibility for the things that I was doing or rather not doing, I spent a lot of time overwhelmed. I was keeping myself in the mindset that I was in and in my comfort zone. I can now change the way that I’m thinking and I can reframe it to a better perspective. I had no fear that this process was going to work. The only reservations I had were more about me and how I would implement it and what it would bring out in me, who I was going to be in the end. To get rid of the beliefs that you have about yourself is a very daunting thing when you don’t quite know where it’s going to end up. I felt like it was working for me as the time went on but I actually can’t believe how far I’ve come in just 8 weeks. I’m checking myself and my emotions all the time. I’m subconsciously putting things in place to avoid those old types of downward spirals. I’m know I’m going to have more belief in myself in future to to achieve the things I want. Working with Radha is easy as she fits the sessions around your life, she’s really flexible and easy to talk to. If you feel like your life’s not going in the right direction for what you need and you feel like there’s something else that’s missing, or if you feel like you’re lacking in self worth, or self esteem, you definitely need to start the programme as it has worked really worked well for me. It will help you to have a better understanding of how your thoughts affect you. I’m going to be promoting this to everyone left, right and centre because it is an amazing programme. It’s presented in a way that is just incredible and how Radha works to help you to visualise the ideas and concepts that she’s explaining is amazing. I don’t think I could ever put it into words how grateful I am Radha. Thank you!
Julie DJ, Band 6 Midwife
Before working with Radha I was miserable and dreaded going into work every day. I'd convinced myself that everybody thought that I was doing everything wrong and that they thought I wasn't good enough to be there. I didn't feel good enough to be there. And I was just not a happy person. I'd had enough and I wanted change, I wanted to be different. I wanted to stop feeling quite so negative all the time. A friend of mine that had completed Radha's programme really recommended her and I thought well, why not? Straight away Radha made it very clear that it was all about my thought processes and that I had control over those, and that actually all of that was already within me to make those necessary positive changes for myself. Radha has helped me realise how I am actually enough. To recognise that I do my best, I work hard, I care about people and I care about myself. That other people's thoughts and what they think of me is not my concern and that actually my concern is me and how I think about things and how I respond to situations. I've already noticed the massive difference in the impact it's had on my life. Instead of letting things overwhelm me I can either choose to address it head on or put a pin in it because it's not my problem. So that is just that's been a revelation for me. I've always been really hung up on my past and my upbringing and I've wanted to resolve those issues and get to the bottom of them and really pull them apart. But actually I realised that none of that really matters. And that it's about who I am now and who I want to be and how I can move forward. I've been able to put a lot of that to rest now. I found that very freeing. It's given me the light that I needed to shine back on myself and it's such a relief. So I feel confident that I've got this! I found working with Radha a lot easier than I thought I was going to. Initially I wasn't really sure how any of it was going to help because I just felt so downtrodden. And the whole misery was just so ingrained, that there didn't seem a way out. But actually Radha threw me a rope and I've pulled myself out. That's kind of what I needed. It's a self reflective programme. I'ts about about opening up and exploring and looking at how actually changing your thought process can have massive impact on the rest of your life in a really positive way. Don't be scared to be yourself. Because actually that's okay, it's enough. There's no harm in having that first call with Radha to see whether or not it's going to work for you and if it feels right then grab it with both hands and take it all on board and just do it!
Emily C, Band 6 Midwife
Before I started working with Radha life was just exhausting. I felt burnt out. I was very anxious, and always worrying about what people thought of me and what I was doing wrong. I was very critical of myself. I'd never wanted to tell my friends or my family to get support but in desperation I'd gone to the GP and tried medication but nothing was really working to help me get to the bottom of what was happening to me and why. The only way I knew how to deal with the anxiety was to comfort eat. To be honest I didn't realise at the time that I was doing that to deal with how I was feeling. I was making unhealthy choices to cope and as a type 1 diabetic I was putting myself at risk to cope with my anxiety and it really wasn't the best thing for me. I was very much blaming midwifery and my job role for how I was feeling. I was about ready to leave. I was at absolute breaking point. In fact I was actively looking at floristry courses, anything that I could think to get me out of this career. I'd never thought about anything like emotional health coaching but I knew a couple of my colleagues had worked with Radha and they'd left amazing reviews and I thought if it had worked so well for them then perhaps it could work for me too. I was at that point where I knew I had to do something about how I was feeling so I just took the plunge. I knew from the very first chat we had chat that working with Radha was going to work for me. I just felt supported and heard, even in that first half an hour. She understood where I was coming from and obviously Radha being a midwife too was so reassuring. That she understood the job and how I was feeling. When I started to the Midwife Sparkle Method Programme I had been off work sick for several weeks. I didn't think I was going to be able to go back. I found it very easy to blame work but I realised through working with Radha that I had to take some responsibility for how I speak to myself and how I react to triggers and situations. Radha has helped me realise that that some of the things I've been doing such as being critical about myself, the people pleasing, the apologising to everyone are things that I've actually been doing most of my adult life and has helped me get to the bottom of why and given me so many practical tools and techniques that have changed so much for me. Initially I think I was just hoping for a 'quick fix', something to help me get back into work as it was affecting my personal life and my relationship being off work. I never dreamed that in just 8 weeks I could come this far! I do honestly feel like a different person. It's just changed everything! I'm now back at work, I don't feel the need to go off sick any more. I feel like like I'm a good midwife and I can do this! I'm more excited about in my personal life as well. I had a lot of social anxiety and it was stopping me doing things like joining the gym to go and exercise with my friends and I found it difficult going out in large groups. Now I'm really looking forward to just having the confidence to go out wherever I want, have fun with my friends do things that scare me a little bit but and not worrying about being judged or what people think about me. So it's made a massive difference in my personal life as well as at work. I feel a happier person, I just feel better. I know can stay as a midwife, knowing that I don't want to give up a career that I worked really hard for. I honestly would recommend the Midwife Sparkle Method Programme programme to anybody and I have actively recommend it to people. I have spoken to counsellors in the in the past and I've been listened to but that's not what we've done on the programme. The programme is about learning and coaching and putting methods into into practice to change how I'm thinking. I just wish that someone had told me all of this 10 years ago and I probably wouldn't have spent so much of my life feeling how I've been feeling. And it is really just session after session lightbulb moments. Thank you Radha, It's been honestly life changing and I can't thank you enough!
Paula B, Band 6 Midwife
So before Radha and I started working together I was struggling with the balance of quite a stressful home life and a high pressure job, a massive caseload with lots of very complex women who have a lot of mental health problems. To be honest, I got to the point where I just wasn’t enjoying anything, I just refused to go out, socialise and refused to do anything because I felt I had to use all my energy just to cope with what I had had to do on a daily basis. But I just felt connected with Radha. I just felt that she were somebody that was going to be able to help guide me and give me the skills and the tools that I needed to take myself to the next level, hopefully for the rest of my life. I’d also be able to pass the skills on to my children, and any colleagues and any woman I meet that might also benefit. I needed all the help I could get and I just felt it was a good investment. The way I look at is you spend a lot of money on makeup and hair (I do anyway sometimes!) and I felt this investment was permanent, it was going to last me forever. Going through this 8 week process has put a magnifying glass on how I have been dealing with things. And that from a positive perspective some of the things I was handling pretty well and then there’s other things I wasn’t doing so well with. Radha helped me discover some of the patterns that I learned in childhood we’re still repeating themselves in a negative way. This programme has just basically highlighted how important your childhood is, which is very relevant to us as midwives because we’re wanting to give the best start to families as possible, but also just because you’ve learned these patterns in childhood doesn’t mean you have to continue with them for the rest your life and most importantly, you don’t have to pass them on to your own kids. So to be able to stop that pattern repeating has been an incredibly uplifting and powerful experience. Every session we had I took something away from it. The importance of strong psychological roots, that’s been a massive thing for me actually. It kind of just encompasses everything that we’d done and it’s just so important. For me as a mother but also for myself – making sure that our roots are strong, because if our roots are strong, we can do anything. I just loved that idea. The stronger your roots, the brighter your bloom. You can shine brighter and help more people if you’ve got strong roots. I have to admit this process does take a lot of reflection and self analysis and sometimes that can be quite difficult, especially after a hard day at work. It’s definitely not an easy thing to have to kind of pick apart how you behave. But its been 100% worth it. I definitely have a lot more hope, courage and strength moving forward. It’s been empowering and it just ties in that if we’re stronger in ourselves as midwives we’re going to be able to help more of the women we meet. This is going to make me a better woman, I hope a better mother and a better midwife, friend and colleague. Anyone thinking of doing this course with Radha then just go for it. Just think about what you want to achieve and go for it, you won’t regret it. You’ll definitely learn lots about yourself, and you’ll come out of it a more healthy person and a much more balanced practitioner as well. Thank you very much Radha. I think it’s amazing that you’ve started this kind of positive mindset course for Midwives. This has been something I think we’ve been lacking in the profession to be honest. It’s about recognising all our strengths, capabilities and skills and congratulating ourselves on what we have achieved. It’s also about balance too, recognising there’s a lot of areas we probably need to improve upon as individuals and on the whole and this work you are doing is just trying to help steer us in the right direction of always striving to be the best we can, be not only for our own sakes, but for everybody that we come into contact with as well. And hopefully that will build a much, much nicer and much more loving and compassionate workforce. That’s hopefully what we’re going to achieve from doing this type of training. It’s just been amazing!
Rachel T, Band 5 Midwife
Anxiety has been a long term issue for me. I hadn't always acknowledged it and I because of my own self esteem, I didn't really feel like I deserved to reach out for help or change anything about it. But it really came to a head last year when I was about to start my job as my anxiety skyrocketed. I was spending a lot of time in lock down mulling over the same things in my head. It really reached like a boiling point because I started having a lot of panic attacks quite regularly and it was at that point I thought I can't do this any more. I need to reach out for help. I had gone to my GP who was really helpful and supportive initially. I was directed to a three week group CBT course which I did and found some skills from that very helpful, but because it was a group session, I felt like it didn't always apply to me, or I didn't always know how to apply it to me. I didn't always see how it was relevant. I just felt like I was feeling all of this anxiety and I was finding it hard to break it down because nobody had really showed me how to. I'd also tried medication as well which actually sometimes had made me feel even worse. I was really looking for anything I could do to help get to the bottom of what was happening to me and why. I found Radha on a student midwife Facebook group that I was in. I was just so desperate for help and to not feel so alone with it. She gave me hope. What Radha was offering sounded perfect for me and to have somebody who really understood the pressures of midwifery and why that might cause me certain anxieties definitely what drew me in. We had an initial call together and something just really clicked. I was in a really bad place and I'd lost my motivation for a lot of stuff but working with Radha has just changed everything It's given me the power to realise I don't have to be that way. I think a lot of my validation before came from other people and sort of taking their feedback as proof that I was that's made me worthy, Radha has made me realise that I can have my own self esteem. Being kind to myself and processing my achievements doesn't make me selfish or arrogant. It's what's going to keep me going. I'd suffered from regular panic attacks before and since working with Radha I haven't had a single one! I've learned how to de escalate it. I's honestly life changing! it's made me realise that I have the power to change if I want to, and even if it is hard work, and it takes a little bit of practice and time I do have the power and I don't have to go back to that dark place if I don't want to. I keep on thinking back on where I was before, and where I am now. I'm so proud of myself. I'm only three months into my career and I'm in a much better place to deal with the things that will come my way. I think it's just gonna stick with me forever. I'm so glad that I have that foundation right at the beginning starting as a band five, to carry me through. If anyone is considering working with Radha I would just definitely say go for it. The real turning point for me was realising I deserved and wanted the help so making an effort to take that leap of faith and realise that I could go on thinking this way for the rest of my life or I could feel slightly differently and just feel so much better. Overall, it's just been so so life changing because I just feel I'm in such a different place. I just never thought I would get here. I knew working with Radha would help me but I didn't realise just how much it was going to positively impact me day to day in my job, but also in my personal life as well. I just feel so much more myself which is massive! I'm excited to carry on practising the things that we've done together and to be able to fill up my own cup. To be better equipped to deal with it with the ups and downs and not get as overwhelmed by it, as I would have done before, is going to be huge. It just makes me feel so much happier, basically. Thank you Radha for everything that you've done to support me it's just been huge. And like I said before, you've given me the tools that I needed to do this. And to feel like I can fill up my own cup.
Cat L, Band 6 Midwife
I was in a really, really dark and horrible place. I've been qualified 10 years now and if I'm honest I've struggled for most of it. I'd actually reached out to Radha earlier in the year but never really followed it up again. I think you only really take the reins and feel really to take control again when you literally hit rock bottom and I was at rock bottom when I reached out to Radha. She seemed very genuine and authentic, because it's a huge thing to open up and be vulnerable but I was ready and I knew I'd found the right person to do it with. I've had lots and lots of therapy throughout my life but Radha explained it was about taking myself to the next level, being accountable and taking responsibility for myself. I can honestly say within two weeks of the programme, my life was just incomparable. The change happened so quickly for me. My life was turning around, I was saying yes to opportunities rather than avoiding them because that huge 'what if' anxiety had just vanished. I have developed emotional control in any given situation, no matter how dire it is, I have the power to control the way that I think or respond to it. I never ever thought that was possible. I was such an emotional person in a fixed mentality but I now know that anything is possible. Anything that I want, it can happen if I work towards it. I feel I attract positivity, no I create it! It's just so empowering! Working with Radha has changed my life and my families life. It's increased my energy and given me the power back over my thought processes. I love who I am now. And I literally have spent my whole life not loving who I am. It's been the best thing I've ever done apart from give birth at home. I literally recommend everyone does Radha's programmes. It can literally have massive gains in every area of your life, because it's a ripple effect, you know, so it's just so worthwhile. You don't need to suffer anymore. You don't deserve to suffer anymore. You deserve to live your best life. And Radha can help you do that. It's just been incredible Radha -Thank you!
Eleni M, Band 6 Midwife
I have worked in healthcare for around 16 years, in various countries. Usually in community settings. I have been a qualified midwife for the last three years. I graduated from York University in North Yorkshire. I am now practising in Northern Ireland where I live with my husband and children. I have always had this feeling that I take up too much space, that I am too loud, too much and should reduce myself down to fit in better. I have always felt fear around the acute clinical areas of midwifery, but completely at home in the community setting. I wanted to be able to learn in new areas to improve my practice. The constant ‘perfectionism’ makes me want to run away at the idea of failing. I was determined to face this fear. I had some awful thought processes which I knew I needed help with. My inner voice was unkind to say the least. I felt huge imposter syndrome and catastrophised about every little thing. I wanted to be in the moment with my children but my days off were consumed by worry. My body hurt and I had physical symptoms of stress. I felt like someone was going to tell me at any minute that I am not really a midwife and they made a mistake! At the same time, I have felt huge frustration that I have not been able to move forward with a small business idea I have had, because of the fear of failing, of making mistakes and giving the negative voice in my head even more reasons to berate me! After a couple of weeks in an acute setting I knew I needed help. I had rising anxiety on the drive to work and I wanted to run away. The negative voice was at its very loudest. I was completely stuck. I decided to work with Radha to try and face some of these negative thought patterns. It felt like the right time. Another midwife who I hugely respect had worked with Radha and it felt like a sign. For the first time I was able to open up to my family about my negative core beliefs. I started to unpick some of these thoughts by allowing myself to be vulnerable enough to share them. Radha taught me how to look at the evidence and explore with me where they came from. In doing so I could relax some of the ridiculously high standards I had for myself. I can be kind to the women in my care but never applied that kindness inwards. I didn’t feel like I deserved it. Radha taught me the tools to address this fixed thinking and see another way forward. It is a work in progress, but I feel like I can move forward now. I felt like every session was a space just for me. I was able to be totally honest with Radha as she is so kind. Radha just absolutely gets what it is like to be a midwife in current times, the joys and the pressure. I looked forward to every session! Radha was exactly the right person at exactly the right time for me. I would not hesitate to recommend Radha, I have learnt so much from her. I am ready to start that business, enjoy my midwifery practice and be in the moment with my family. Thank you!
Emma H, Student Midwife
When I first contacted Radha I was having having a major wobble in my life, particular with my midwifery degree. I'm a third year student and was massively doubting my ability to be able to do the job. I was having lots of negative thoughts and has such low self esteem. I was feeling quite anxious and low, not wanting to go in to practice quite a lot of the time. Sitting in the car park before shifts thinking “I just don't want to do this” and then during the shift counting down the hours thinking, “Oh, God, if I can just make it through then I can go home.” Radha had spoken at our student midwifery conference a few months previous and I just found it really interesting and could recognise a lot of the things she said in myself, especially the imposter syndrome and perfectionism elements. Prior to that I'd accepted that it was just me and there was nothing I could do about it. Radha helped me see that these weren't personality traits but were behaviours I could do something about by changing my mindset and that I didn't have to be trapped inside my own head. I remember thinking 'what have I got to loose?' I could carry on with the way I'm thinking now, and potentially get my degree, and then just look for another job or actually develop of self confidence and learn a better way of understanding myself and my thoughts. I did have reservations about the financial side of it but then I decided that you get out of it what you put in so I just had to go for it! It's difficult to put into words how I feel compared to just 8 weeks ago. I actually feel completely different. I feel so much more confident and comfortable to be almost qualified. I'm now looking forward to starting work. I definitely feel so much better. Reconsigning that trying to be perfect isn't achievable. Allowing myself to be able to make mistakes and seeing them as learning opportunities and moving on rather than beating myself up for weeks at a time, which I would have done before. I think that's probably my biggest advice to anyone thinking of working with Radha is be open minded. There's are probably loads of people out there that think, “Oh, well, that's just the way I am. I'm just an anxious person", or "I've just got low self esteem and that's it." But you don't realise that there's actually something you can do about that. Unless people know about it, then they're just going to carry on through that negative cycle. Radha is such a positive influence. She's so bubbly and happy and it rubs off! The way she is and how she explains things really helps when doing this kind of deep personal work. What makes it so impactful is that she's so relatable. She's been there and she understands what's its like to struggle with these things and now she helps other midwives to come out of the other side as well. Thank you Radha, it's been a very insightful journey and I've learned such a lot about myself. Everyone needs to know these things about themselves, it's life changing!
Nicola N, Band 6 Midwife
I was feeling really defeated and very anxious all the time. I always had that background anxiety, very self doubting and actually self loathing as well. It was just a constant theme. It was from the moment I woke up till I went to bed. I found Radha through a colleague and it was just like she was inside my head! She seemed to know exactly how I thought and felt. It was such a relief to not feel so alone. As soon as we had our first call I got a really good vibe from Radha. It just felt right! Financially I did wonder if I could justify spending the money on myself, when you've got a family and other commitments the guilt sets in. But I realised life's a long time to live it miserably, and that then impacts everybody in your family. Plus Radha was flexible, so you didn't have to pay all in one go. I never doubted if it would be worth it. I knew with Radha being a midwife that she understood the culture and the pressures. I was so eager and enthusiastic to get started. Throughout my time with Radha I've seen an improved across the board in so many aspects of my life, not just with work and my confidence. Being in the moment more, enjoying being with my family without having this constant cloud over my head. I'm just feeling lighter and more positive. It was just what I needed. I'd done CBT in the past and seen some results in the short term but it didn't last. I know the work I've done with Radha has gone deeper than that and I'm confident I'll be able to keep up the good work and keep building on my progress. I don't know where I would have been if I hadn't of done it. I would have probably ended up being off on the sick with no way to help myself to get back on track, and that's a scary thought to be honest. If you're thinking of getting in touch with Radha than DO IT, because what's the alternative? You're just going to continue down that slippery slope just like I was. And sometimes you just need a little bit of intervention to redirect you, which is exactly what Radha does. She helps to put you on a better path. Thank you Radha, it's been brilliant!
Vicky H, Band 6 Midwife
I used to feel like I didn't have any control over how I was thinking and how I acted in certain situations. I just felt like I needed to make the best out of what I was. I didn't believe I could actually change it. I definitely had anxiety. I would change who I was in different situations and that actually made me feel worse about myself. I didn't like who I was so I did it to protect myself. It was having an effect on my work and I was struggling to enjoy my interactions with patients and colleagues. I just felt stuck and like I needed to try something new. The fact that what Radha offered was specifically midwife related was what most appealed to me because I think a lot of like counsellors or therapists don't really understand the feelings that we get from putting all of ourself into how we care for our patients. They focus more on the external 'fluffy stuff'. They might listen to you talk but you don't actually learn anything from it. They can help you go through the past and try and work out your feelings or validate your feelings but they don't ever really teach you how you can change going forward. Whereas Radha seemed more real and I could see the benefit it would have for me on a practical level. It seemed more like an adult education course that if you put the effort into it you'd get the results. I feel you can't expect a good outcome from something that you're not putting any effort into. I didn't have any reservations about starting. It was all via Zoom so I felt comfortable opening up and talking from the comfort of my own home. The fact that it was also 1:1 removed the nerves around saying something controversial or oversharing in a group and it just felt fine. Working with Radha has honestly given me control over my life. It's made me feel worthy. I can feel like my life can be whatever I want it to because that's up to me. I can be the kind of person that can make the most out of something instead of feeling hard done by or feeling like I don't deserve to be happy. Our ability to do this and be in control of our own life has always been there but we've just not realised it and now we do know its up to us to do something about it. To be accountable for ourself. We are in our job, aren't? We're accountable and responsible in our jobs. So why have we not internalised that and realised we are accountable for ourselves on a personal level too. I always keep coming back to what Radha taught me about focusing on what we can control and what we can influence. That even though we can't always control what's happening, we can control how we think and feel about it. At the end of the day, it's our life and we get to choose how we live it. But I didn't think that I would feel like this. I didn't think it was possible. It's a dull drizzly day today, but I still feel excited about life and that there's things to look forward to. I don't feel like I'm controlled by anything other than the effort that I'm going to put into myself. So it's exciting and scary all at once! But that's life, isn't it? We've got to take it and run with it instead of cowering away. Everyone should be taught this information that Radha is sharing. At school, at uni. We should all be sharing and helping other people to feel in control of their life and this would be then reminding and reaffirming back to ourselves what we've learned and understood. Thank you so much Radha!
Sara A, Band 5 Midwife
I felt very stressed, very self doubting, very negative, like I wasn't worth very much. And I was struggling with my self esteem a lot. I saw something by Radha on Facebook and I just thought because she's also a midwife she would understand better than a different type of counsellor or coach. Initially I had so many reservations because I just felt like I wasn't worth it. I was very cynical and thought I was beyond help. But then I felt something inside me say I needed to give myself a chance and Radha saw something in me too that helped me to think maybe I could do this. This is a big theme that came out of all our sessions actually. I think for me it's felt like I was in a long dark tunnel, stuck and unable to find my way out. And then seeing there's a little light getting closer and closer. And then I see it's Radha there with her lantern saying 'come on, this is the way'. It felt like seeing a light in the darkness, such relief. It's just amazing. I feel like this programme has lifted me out of a pit of despair, for want of a better way to describe it. From feeling like I was broken and not good enough, and that feeling of self loathing and paranoia. It's a very sad way of thinking when I look back at it now. But it's just helped me to look inside my self and reflect on my life so far and accept myself, but also to learn about the way other people think of me as well. Realising that actually not everybody is thinking of me in a negative way, because everybody's got their own things that they're dealing with and be able to turn things around in more more positive mindset. I feel like I've found who I'm supposed to be and like I'm prepared for whatever comes my way. If you're considering working with Radha then just get in touch with her and have a conversation, because it will really help. I almost didn't do it. I'm not gonna lie. I almost didn't as I had so much self doubt. But after having a chat with her and realising I could pay over a period of time rather than in a lump sum, I knew I needed to do this for myself. So, whatever position you're in it's always worth a phone call. It's always worth a conversation and you'll realise that you can be helped that you are worth helping. And it's just believing in yourself and thinking really seriously about it because it will change your life.
Sarah E, Midwife
My life was quite a dark place, a lonely place. I had a lot negative thoughts and I overthought pretty much everything that I did. I knew I was unhappy and that something had to change, I just wasn't too sure what it was or how I could change it or if it was even possible. I didn't want to end my career as a midwife but I couldn't see how I could continue for another 20 odd years, but Radha made it sound really doable and she was so enthusiastic and encouraging. Initially I was a little sceptical as I didn't see how it was possible to make such a change in such a short time. Eight weeks doesn't seem that long does it? But seeing the evidence from Radha's other clients that had experienced amazing results I knew I wanted to do it and that the onus was on me to make it work. There's been so many light bulb moments along the way and I've learned so much about me. When you're busy you don't always give enough time for yourself. Having this time with Radha to really think about me and what I need has given me the encouragement to see the bigger picture. It's just completely flipped my perceptions. I would never have thought I could feel this positive. Now I actually want to go to work and it's been a long time since I've really wanted to go to work and enjoy what I do at work. It's also really just increased my confidence. Being kind and positive to myself and using the visualisations and self affirmations. It's become my little ritual and I do think they are really making a big difference. Also, being able to change how I think and how I see things. So going from always thinking negatively and believing that people are talking about me to seeing the reality of what's going on, rather than those negative distorted perceptions. It's just really changed everything. I've really enjoyed this course. It's been so amazing and Radha is just so easy to talk to. I feel lighter and in control. I'm ready to start being seen and heard now, and I just can't wait to go to work and share what I've learned and empower other midwives and spread that positivity. If your considering doing this course then just be open and honest with yourself. Believe that you can do it because you can and it's so worth it. It's life changing and you'll have these skills and tools for the rest of you're life. Just do it!
Emma, Band 5 Midwife
Before starting the program with Radha, I was not in a great place since qualifying. My confidence was rock bottom, and I was seriously considering leaving Midwifery. Although I had great supportive colleagues around me, a rotation in community had left me doubting my abilities, impostor syndrome was rife, and I was constantly anxious wondering when I was going to make a mistake. Radha was recommended to me through a colleague who had completed the course and as soon as I had my 30 minute chat with her I knew that this is something I needed to do, an investment in myself after 4 years of studying to do the job I have always dreamed of doing. When Radha spoke of the content, I couldn’t see at that point coming out the other side as confident as she promised I would be; but step by step we talked about why I was feeling the way I did, and she gave me coping mechanisms and the tools I needed to see what I really needed to. The process has been a realisation that it is normal to feel the way I do, being anxious shows my passion for my job but also that my best is good enough, I am good enough! I am now back on labour ward and working towards my B6 with confidence. I will continue to use the skills that Radha has taught me and I am so very grateful for her passion towards helping me, thank you Radha.
Sophie J, Student Midwife
Before working with Radha I was having panic attacks constantly, kept doubting myself and just didn't feel good enough. I second guessed myself a lot too. I didn't feel good enough to qualify and was terrified of failure. Radha spoke at our student conference and I was just like, “Yes, I need this. I need this in my life!” because I'd tried so many things and nothing was working for me. I've been on medication, done counselling on various levels and had CBT. I felt more often than not, they were just picking at old wounds though. And I often left feeling sad, to be honest. And then the medication helped at times but I didn't really want to be on it any more. I did feel a bit scared in case this was just another thing that just didn't work and maybe I was too far gone to be helped. But I wanted to give it a good try and wow has this programme given me a different perspective! It's has just made things clear. I now know I can be a better version of myself. My anxiety and my self doubt literally had the hardest hold on me ever. Working with Radha has showed me that I'm stronger than I thought I was. And I have a lot more control than I thought too. I felt like I got so much from every single session that I wish I'd of known it all a long time ago. I knew literally from day one that this was such a good investment. I think sometimes when you think about the cost of stuff, it's can feel scary, because it sounds like a lot. But if you break it down you think actually it's only this much a session and if it's gonna change your life, it's literally buttons, Like, there's no price on that. I know I'd have actually paid more if I had to and I'd still tell people to go to Radha if she was more expensive because there is no price on what this can do for you. I see how this has literally changed my life. It was also easy enough to fit in the sessions each week around studying and placement. Radha is really flexible and I think everyone should take the time for themselves to do something like this. I don't think an hour out of your time a week is anything compared to the benefit you will get. I think the hardest part was the realisation that actually there's so much more I could have done in my life but I was just too scared at the time. It's sad. But now I'm going to take absolutely every opportunity and every experience and make the absolute most out of everything that I do and if things go a bit wrong, it's fine, because I know that I've literally given it my all and that's enough. I just think working with Radha has made the absolute difference to my life. I think my life's gonna be so much better from now on and I literally cannot even thank you enough Radha . I'm just really glad I saw you at the conference and that I took the leap because it means so much.
Kenza, Student Midwife
''Within a few seconds for our discovery call, I just knew that I wanted Radha to go on this adventure with me. Months later I know I made the right choice. I felt so seen and understood. Everything she said resonated so deeply with me. She held the space, in which I could just be. With the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that did not make sense to me, in deciding whether or not to return to my studies. I felt so overwhelmed, that I forgot how to take care of myself. Guiding me through her programme, Radha taught me to give my nervous system a break and return to a place where I felt strong and capable. I am extremely grateful for everything she taught me, which goes way beyond the world of midwifery. Radha will teach you skills that will enrich every part of your being and life."
Tirza, Student Midwife
Before my sessions with Radha I felt sad, afraid and panicked when was on placement and even when I thought about my midwifery placement. I also felt insecure about my skills and felt like I was way behind, compared to my classmates. Through my 4 years of studying, I hoped these feelings would go away, while my skills where evolving. But when I noticed they got even worse, I knew it was time to seek help. When I had my first call, (to see if we were a good fit), I noticed immediate relief. I got hopeful that things would improve and was motivated to start. In the beginning my thoughts where: even if it gets 20% better, I would be super happy! After maybe 2 or 3 sessions I felt like it was going to be more then 20%. I think I was very open to change and wanted it badly, so I don’t think I had any reservations. For me my biggest positive outcomes are that my thought process changed about lots of things. Both conscious and subconscious. My focus was everything around midwifery, but I feel like it also helped a lot with my mindset on other parts of my life. It was a very good experience for me. In a way it felt like self-care. Every session I felt better. I never felt uncomfortable or like quitting and was very motivated to do every exercise. In the end, my mindset change was way more than 20%. Something I didn’t count on in the beginning. I feel very proud and relieved. I also feel empowered to use the tools and skills when I start my placement. I’m excited to see how I will develop and grow on my placement. For the first time ever, I’m also excited to start my placement! I personally started working with Radha because I realized I should start caring about myself more. I think many people don’t start because its unfamiliar to care about yourself in this way. I went on holidays or to the sauna to relax, but it didn’t help for my negative mindset and anxiety. This programme does change this part, which is the most important part! I would (and already am) recommending this to all midwifery students, because I think we can be better midwives if we take good care of ourselves.
Lyndsey B, Midwife
I used to be completely anxious before going into work. I'd be dreading it and worrying that I wouldn't be able to cope, I'd be doubting myself constantly. Also in my personal life I was just very low in mood and anxious in general. I'd tried lots of different things and nothing had helped me to deal with everything that was going on at work and in my personal life. Like how I felt about myself, I didn't like myself really, a lot of the time. As a Midwife our work is a big part of our life. The struggles of starting as a newly qualified midwife was contributing to my struggles because I don't think anyone prepares you from going from a student to a newly qualified midwife. And how you're going to feel and how you're going to deal with it. And the amount of self criticism that you have when you start as a new midwife just completely overtakes the fact that you've just qualified and you're now got this amazing job that you got in out of goodness knows how many other people who interviewed or applied, and you completely forget about the achievements that you've done, to get to that point, like how hard you've worked, and where you've come from, in your life. I didn't want to give up the four years of hard work to qualify to get the dream job I wanted to have to leave within six months of being a qualified. I owed it to myself and to my family to try and be a happier person overall. Seeing Radha's posts on social media was like “Oh, my God, that is how I feel. And that's how I'm thinking. This is a total stranger and it's like she's in my head saying what I'm thinking! Then when I read testimonies from other midwives and how starting the Midwife Sparkle Method programme had helped them turn their lives around in just 8 weeks, I just knew I'd got to try it. It just connected with me. I've paid out for so many different treatments before like healing and counselling but nothing as specialised as this programme. Being a midwife too Radha just got it, she understood what its like to struggle on a personal and professional level. The cost of the 8 week programme, when you actually broke it down is a small drop in the ocean when you weigh up that these positive changes will stay with you for your whole career. When you invest that time and money you are committed. I think before when I've had counselling I would be reliant on that person to fix me and not have to do anything myself. I'd go into an hour appointment, sit there, cry a bit, offload and open my emotions and that would be that. But that's the difference with Radha's programme is very practical. I'd have to go away and use those tools an techniques she'd taught me out in practice and I'd see things start to change for me very quickly actually. I realised now that it's only me that can change me, its about taking that leap and the responsibility for yourself. Working with Radha has definitely made me completely change my thought process when dealing with situations in my personal life and at work. I know I can deal with those anxious and stressful situations now, as she's given me all the tools and the techniques to be able to look at things from a different perspective. That it doesn't matter now what people think of me, it's about what I think and feel about myself that matters. I'm so much happier and I know now I can become the midwife that I want to be. I think if you're in that place where you're looking for help, and you come across Radha's page you've been bought there for a reason. I'm a big believer in fate. And I think, if you've read something that you've connected with then listen to your gut, believe in yourself and just go for it! Working with Radha has made me excited for the future. I'm just really appreciative because I really didn't think I could feel this different just eight weeks ago but I've definitely got all the things to use to help me go forward. I think what Radha is doing is very unique, it's just brilliant! what she does is making such massive differences to people's lives and work and I know there would be a lot less midwives if she wasn't doing what she's doing. Thank you so much!
Nicola S, Midwife
I was very unsure of who I was and kept questioning what everybody thought of me. I came across as confident on the outside, but on the inside, I was crumbling in to little pieces in every area of my life- at home with my children, at work, as a friend, as a partner. I'd been through so much in my childhood and then so many things in my adult life too - a marriage breakdown etc. I was somebody just felt lost in this crazy world thinking actually, where on earth do I fit in? And who am I? For years and years I'd been in this constant battle. Reading so many different self help books, going to see the GP for medication. Always thinking “I can do it, I'll be fine. I'm a strong person. I'm confident. I'm always happy. I'm the fixer for everyone around me. I'll be okay”. But I was never actually getting to bottom of what was going on for me. I was forever getting to a certain point and then going back round that loop again. I didn't feel great about myself. I'd put myself down a lot and was never satisfied with my achievements. Always telling myself I wasn't good enough. I'd had enough. I'd watched Radha from the side lines helping midwives, colleagues of mine giving amazing feedback about working with her and I was drawn to working with her too. I had an initial chat with her but I was convinced she was going to say her programme wouldn't work for me because I thought all this was just a part of who I was. That I was the victim and had to learn to cope with it, but as soon as she confirmed she could help me I knew I needed to do it. To invest in myself. Working with Radha was exactly what I needed. I was so open and so ready for the changes I've experienced to happen. It's given me the courage and self compassion to just be me. It's helped me give myself permission to be myself. And to know that the right people love me. And the right people will be around me and that's it. I don't need to fit in, I don't need to be part of this group or that group. All I need is to be is me. Showing up authentically and getting the most out of my relationships and doing what I need to do. It's so nice to embrace your own vulnerabilities. Because none of us are perfect. And yet, not every day is going to be a shiny, sparkly day. But that's really nice to know, that that's okay! You can still embrace that. And your environment, your vulnerabilities can empower somebody else. And you just move through into the next chapter as you go along. My biggest breakthrough was overcoming a horrific hang up I'd had with my step dad. It had controlled absolutely everything about me or a long, long time. The day I had the realisation about it was actually the fifth of May, which was international midwife day. And that was actually my stepdads birthday and it had always previously been a day that haunted me. But that day this year I understood for the first time that I'm worthy enough and good enough. To be here, to be a midwife. Everything just fell into place and I reclaimed it as my day for the first time in over 25 years. I would have paid Radha 3 times over to feel how I feel now without that in my life. It's just empowering, totally empowering. I feel like the world's weight has gone off my shoulders. I'm just happy with where I am at and what I'm doing. I don't have to go and do anything more to try and prove myself. I've always loved midwifery and know this is what I'm meant to do. But I don't think I've ever truly let that sparkle out with confidence. Now I have the self esteem and self belief to do that. That's been the biggest breakthrough. I now feel on the inside what everyone was seeing on the outside, but it's real! I've realised it's okay to be me, and I've really found who I am. If you're like I was and Radha keeps popping up and like knocking on your door, eventually there'll be a time when that door opens, and you've just got to go in there, jump in feet first and go for it. Don't keep telling yourself it's not right just because you're scared of change. Take that risk because believe me, it's not a risk. It's like the best thing you can do. Jump in head first and find you, for you.
Halle, Student Midwife
Before I started working with Radha I was close to taking a break from my degree as I felt overwhelmed with placement and academic work. I contacted Radha as I could not see a way forward in my midwifery career. My confidence and self-esteem were extremely low, I dreaded placement, and I knew I needed support to continue with my life as a student midwife. From the first initial meeting I began to see light at the end of the tunnel. Just knowing I could feel differently was a huge turning point for me, and I was immediately optimistic about the coming weeks. Before joining I was most concerned that I was too far gone; I felt so low for so long that I didn’t know if I could feel any differently. This programme has helped me in so many ways. I recognise that the way I thought, which I had done for years, had been holding me back from experiencing life to the fullest. My biggest breakthrough was challenging the negative beliefs I had about myself. I started to treat myself with kindness and compassion, which immediately made a massive positive impact on my life. It was challenging to realise that I could have felt differently about myself a long time ago. Much of what Radha discussed with me seemed so obvious in the moment, yet I had never even considered it before our sessions. For me, this process has been transformational. I feel more connected and in control of myself, my thoughts and beliefs. The knock-on effects are huge – I am socialising more, physically caring for myself, finding new hobbies and passions. Before starting this programme I wouldn’t have believed this was possible. Now I am finishing my dissertation and I am applying for jobs which I wouldn’t have previously thought about. I am genuinely exciting about my future, and feel confident that I can cope and learn from whatever happens next in my life.